Dispatches from an Un-American (II)

There's a spoof report written by imaginary management consultants for Al-Qaida over on openDemocracy.net. Incidentally, I had pondered for quite a while a report of that kind of my own, a short "executive summary" of which I enclose below:

How to murder Americans with impunity in three simple steps

1. Become incorporated.
2. Donate handsomely to the GOP.
3. Kill Americans by polluting air, water, and soil with highly toxic substances.

Rationale

In the United States "freedom" means above all freedom to do business. Its stone-age capitalist economic system is heavily tilted towards the interests of business, and against those of ordinary people. As a business you are effectively free from environmental regulations, free from taxation, and free from any responsibility towards your workers and the people living around you. You can therefore pollute the environment with highly toxic substances and hence poison Americans without fear of retribution - as long as it is part of a business with a solid profit motive, preferably in the petrochemical and/or energy arena.

By donating to the GOP you are seen as a member of the Republican business community. Not only will the Republican establishment virtually guarantee that you can pollute and hence poison Americans with impunity, but they will also protect and shield you from litigation by people living within the polluted area. Furthermore, left-wing environmentalists who undoubtedly will be protesting the pollution of their community will be branded by Republicans as loony liberal anti-corporate eco-terrorists who hate freedom.

Note that murdering Americans through pollution is not necessarily as spectacular as flying an airplane into a building, but it can provide a steady stream of casualties, and at the same time guarantee you a first-class seat on an airplane leaving the country should anything go wrong.